I wrote the following song during one of the darkest periods in my life. Every day was a struggle, every night a storm.
I drag myself out of the bed
screams of night still stuck in my head
Better day hopes are slowly crumbling away
should I run for the day or would I rather be dead
Dont wanna face the day
But still gotta fight for bread
Dont wanna feel like crap
But still gotta high for med
Dont wanna cry and weep
Dont wanna curse and bleep
Dont wanna shoot me down
But life's nothing but dread
I drag myself out of the bed
Eyes are burning all the walls are red
I'm scratching and clawing but things are slipping away
I'm crying so loud but all the tears are shed
Thought I was sent to shine
Thought I was meant to rhyme
Thought I was here to stay
Thought I had dreams to mine
Thought I was built so strong
Thought I was first in line
My hopes have fallen down
Oh God give me a sign
I tried to drag these thoughts out of my head
Throwing empty smiles, I'm hanging by thread
I've come too far to run, too scared to stay
Dreams are broken now, oh for them I bled
I'm not bleaching lies
I'm too broke to fix
I'm here to laugh and cry
I know the worlds can mix
Wish I could walk the fires
Wish I could kiss the flame
Wish I was brave enough
To face the hell within
Wish I didnt crave for fame
Wish I didn't feel the shame
Wish I had sense to lose
Wish I had soul to blame
I know the world is dark
You can't just shy from stains
My words are cry for help
Or shit that clogs the drain
Will I just crash and crawl
Or will I just bash my brains
Will I be crowned the king
Or will I just drown in rains
Will I just roam these halls
Will I be caught in crime
Will I just laugh and smile
Will I just ever be fine
Will I just ever be fine
Oh God! just give me a sign